Finding Your Place in the World Even in the Face of Uncertainty

“In directing my path, randomness played a major part,” reflects Marina Benedetti, Senior Economist in the Research Office of SACE – the Italian public insurer for foreign trade – recalling the sliding doors of her career as an economist and, even before that, as a student. “After high school, I wanted to study literature, but my father wanted me to study law, and so I chose economics to show him that I could also succeed in a subject I wasn’t passionate about. I applied to CLEACC, the Bocconi degree in cultural management, thinking I was more suited for the humanities, but instead I was admitted to DES, the degree in economics and social sciences, where I fell in love with mathematics and macroeconomics. I would have liked to continue in academia by pursuing a doctorate at a prestigious university, but my grades were not high enough and I lost this opportunity, so I had to accept a job that I didn’t like at first. But I always persevered, trying to learn something in every situation, and today I find myself at a company that I like, with a job that satisfies me and in which I can fully express myself.”

The moral of Marina Benedetti’s story is a welcome alternative to the typical one of somebody who has clear ideas from the start and manages to achieve what they set out to do. “Having defined objectives from the start is a stroke of luck, but it’s not the only way to find your place in the world,” continues the economist from SACE. “After 13 years spent in Mediobanca’s Research Office, for example, I realized that my smile had waned because, despite the environment being very formative and professional, a real school of thought, the subjects I was dealing with failed to excite me. I needed to change, but when they asked me what I wanted to do, trouble started. The question made me anxious because the only thing I knew was what I didn't want to do. I didn’t and do not excel at anything in particular, but I had interests in many directions, I'm a curious and committed person, that I knew. At that point I applied for countless jobs, some I couldn’t pursue because they involved moving abroad and seemed incompatible with my family, and in others, like the one at McKinsey, I sabotaged myself a bit for fear of not being able to say no to an eventual job proposal from them. In the end, the right phone call, the one from SACE, arrived, which is why I would like to tell young women who feel insecure that the important thing is always to persevere in your search and be ready when opportunity strikes. Today my smile has returned and I have many professional satisfactions. I also have dark circles under the eyes, because you work a lot here, but the former is more important.”

The idea that taking other paths in one’s career would have been different is a recurring thought that feeds on regrets and fuels dissatisfaction, risking to affect personal life choices as well. “As I said, there were times in which I put family ahead of career decisions,” continues Ms Benedetti. “I did this in the awareness that the most important goal, both for me as a person and as a professional, was to find a balance between these two fundamental aspects, because in this way I would have had the motivation and energy to do well on both fronts.” In the name of balance, Benedetti expresses her opinion on the issue of gender disparity in the workplace. “I am a bit against gender quotas,” she admits. “Looking also at SACE, where many top male positions have been naturally replaced by women executives, it seems to me that the process of change has now been triggered and there is no need for solutions that risk creating excesses in the opposite direction. In fact, from my point of view, if a good cisgender male colleague were to have fewer opportunities for reasons related to these parameters, I would experience it as a limitation, not as progress.”